A total and brazen humility
Why the guts to ask for what you don't deserve is exactly what you need
Humility is a state of striving.
A working. If you’ve arrived… you probably missed it.
(Sorry)
Some people need to humble up. Some need to humble down. Some need to do both.
(That’s me)
The reality that we wrestle, pretty much universally, with missing the window for ‘right sized’ is pretty clear.
We have thoughts of being unworthy or not good enough. We have thoughts of being too good or important.
It’s normal.
Both are toxic to our health.
Usually, but not always, we focus in on the need for folks to ‘humble down’ and that’s an understandable preference. The person that needs to humble down is (usually) pretty obnoxious.
I understand this reasonably well.
I have a mountain of embarrassing memories of being exactly that person.
I was intolerable.
(Intolerable)
I was like salt in a wound for every person who was actually trying… so I get it. The arrogance and vanity, usually unconscious, that goes with a need to humble down can be galling.
(So many cringy memories)
It’s also a non starter for anything spiritual.
God is a perfect gentleman and He will not force himself on us.
We have to be willing to ask.
If we need to humble down, it’s impossible to ask for help. We have to be able to conclude that we need the help, that we can’t do it alone.
But that cuts the other way too. It’s just as important to humble up.
And we don’t tend to see this one nearly as clearly.
We don’t talk about it culturally. We shy away from any read that’s even mildly critical of a posture that needs to humble up and I get it…
Somewhere between compassion for (and fear of) others we often choose not to speak up… but I believe that not addressing this is a poor expression of love.
Love speaks up, even when it means difficulty.
Especially when it means difficulty.
(If we cannot count on the people we love to speak up… who can we count on?)
This is vital.
Because the need to humble up is as much a non starter spiritually as out right arrogance and vanity.
In my own life, it was only long after I began addressing the need in my heart to ‘humble down’ I began to see just how much I needed to ‘humble up.’
But I do.
I really do.
I have so much fear that I am not worth listening to.
I feel that fear right now.
This second.
Now.
(Really)
That’s okay. Courage is what happens when I deal with it. And that’s a gift and I’m grateful.
That I - we - get to make that choice.
Because God is a perfect gentleman and He will not force himself on us.
The thing is, if we need to humble up, it’s impossible to ask for help. We have to be able to conclude that there’s a point, that we’re worth listening to.
It takes both hands.
(Holding up hands)
It’s the same.
Nowhere is this more clear than in the story of the ‘Gentile Woman,’ a remarkable story in the book of Matthew.
This is the story of a person interacting with Jesus that would have had no presumed rights to do so …religious nicety of the time requiring a brutal rejection of her as a ‘Gentile Woman.’
Part of the story is exactly that rejection on the part of the disciples and then seemingly by Jesus himself.
(Blinking)
I’m just going to hold in trust that Jesus knew exactly where this was going and was overjoyed to have such a wonderful example to show people.
The thing to understand is that a female foreigner was not in a position to ask for anything from a Jewish Rabbi.
It just wasn’t the thing.
This was an entirely powerless person in the context of a religiously ‘correct’ perspective, fighting an uphill battle to be seen and heard.
(There are some deeper questions to ask on the relevance of that today)
That powerlessness of our hero sets the stage for you and I to understand something critical.
But before we get to it, it is worth noting that this really is a very special story.
It’s not often the hero of a story about Jesus is another person.
There’s a few other instances I can think of that come close… and they all follow the same essential pattern. They involve an outsider or an untouchable who by definition should have been rejected… but who had something in their posture when they approached Jesus with that just ‘worked’ for Him (one without even saying a word)… and with profound and sometimes wondering approval He granted their request.
And praised their faith.
Pretty much every time.
‘The Centurion’s Servant’ Matthew 8:5-13 plus parallels
‘The Blind Beggar on the Way To Jericho’ Luke 18:35-43 plus parallels
‘The Bleeding Woman’ Mark 5:25-34 plus parallels
But this one is special.
Here we have our hero fighting on behalf of another powerless person… one just a bit more powerless than her… and she doesn’t give up or take no for an answer.
She grabs hold and doesn’t let go.
There’s a lot here. There’s some great questions this story raises that I’d love to explore another time.
There are tremendous implications here about what God values, our own hearts, how we seek, our motivations, our compassion, our culture, and of course, when and how we’re supposed to fight for more than we find available to us.
All vital.
But not the one thing I cannot get out of my head.
The one thing I cannot get out of my head is that this remarkable hero does something I think few ever will, would, or could do.
She demonstrates perfectly what is required of us to approach this remarkable God of ours who is so much better than we deserve and to ask for what we need.
She becomes the model.
Matthew 15:21-28
Then Jesus left Galilee and went north to the region of Tyre and Sidon. A Gentile woman who lived there came to him, pleading, “Have mercy on me, O Lord, Son of David! For my daughter is possessed by a demon that torments her severely.”
But Jesus gave her no reply, not even a word. Then his disciples urged him to send her away. “Tell her to go away,” they said. “She is bothering us with all her begging.”
Then Jesus said to the woman, “I was sent only to help God’s lost sheep—the people of Israel.”
But she came and worshiped him, pleading again, “Lord, help me!”
Jesus responded, “It isn’t right to take food from the children and throw it to the dogs.”
She replied, “That’s true, Lord, but even dogs are allowed to eat the scraps that fall beneath their masters’ table.”
“Dear woman,” Jesus said to her, “your faith is great. Your request is granted.” And her daughter was instantly healed.
Both hands.
One statement.
A relentless pursuit of God.
A total and brazen humility.
Boom.
May we be so bold.
Matthew 15:27
She replied, “That’s true, Lord, but even dogs are allowed to eat the scraps that fall beneath their masters’ table.”
Jesus called this faith.
I think that’s worth noting.
All scripture referenced is NLT unless otherwise noted. I prefer NLT for postural discussion as it is both reasonably rigorous while retaining a conversational tone.
For study I strongly encourage the use of original language tools, multiple translations, and rigorous critical thought.
Please remember that when you read the Bible in English you are always reading someone else’s theological interpretation of the text.